How to change the world, one small act at a time. Even the biggest revolutions start small. First, an idea. Then many modest acts which, like ripples on a pond, spread out, overlap each other, and suddenly surge into something that changes millions of lives. CaringBridge staffer Melissa Bear believes in this, and has a “recipe for ripples” that can apply to anyone. “One person’s act of caring can create a ripple effect that becomes larger than that single action,” she says. Her own “acts” are the caregiving tasks she does for her family and friends. “I try to spread [...]

Following my mother’s battle with cancer, the question that arose for me was, what do I do with all of this? “This” being all of the feelings of loss, pain, missed moments, and the big unanswered question — why? I had to decide how I would harness and use this experience. I chose to embrace and act upon the gifts my family and friends so willingly gave during that time—unconditional love and support. It came down to two things I knew I wanted to do: 1. Reach out to others dealing with brain cancer or the loss of a parent [...]

Back to my status as martyr. For some history on this, read my first blog post, Top 3 reasons why I’m a martyr…not a caregiver. In dealing with cancer in my family, these unexpected people began to pop up in my life in roles I never would’ve assigned to them. Some people I knew well, but there were some people I didn’t know at all. Since I’m not casserole caregiver, nor would I ever confess to being underwater or failing in this role, I had to rely on the small miracles of people who stepped in. As a classic martyr, I [...]

Why do I refuse to fall into the category called “CAREGIVER?” There are several reasons I never want to be a caregiver. I started collecting them over a decade ago when I first encountered the term. This list wasn’t a conscious effort, it was born out of a cringing response to brochures and advice handed to me with the challenges of caregiving, most of which seemed to have no application for what I was dealing with. The advice included such suggestions as: take a bath, find time for yourself and get a pedicure. My top 3 reasons for martyrdom 1. [...]